Company on the Trail
In publishing Swimming Up the Sun, I often hear from people who want to search for family members. Perhaps they've tried, and it didn't work out. I always tell folks that time plays an enormous role in the success of reunion. Time and company. You don't have to walk the road of reunion alone; in fact, I highly advise against it. It's too easy to get discouraged [dis - couraged, to lose one's courage] or to miss an important clue or opportunity because of the whirl of emotions. In the DC area, we have the Adoptee-Birthparent Support Network and Concerned United Birthparents. The American Adoption Congress links a nationwide network of similar organizations. These are organizations of our peers. They hold monthly meetings, help us search, support us when the going gets tough (it always gets tough!), and rejoice with us at every breakthrough, no matter how small. I completed my search before attending ABSN meetings but those adoptees and birthmoms carried me through some dark times. They walked with me along the seemingly endless road to openness and love. It's an adventure but it's scary. You don't have to do it alone, so don't.